


Feathers and Freedom

by teamcap4bucky



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-20
Updated: 2018-11-20
Packaged: 2019-08-26 16:38:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16685266
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teamcap4bucky/pseuds/teamcap4bucky
Summary: What do you do when you think you hear someone fooling around in a closet. Stay and listen, or run for the hills.





	Feathers and Freedom

What are you guys doing?” Steve approaches cautiously as he can see a ball of his teammates huddled around a hallway closet door. 

“Shhhh!” Bucky whispers frantically, covering Steve’s mouth. “We think someone’s having sex in the closet!”

“Come on guys, that's not cool, get away from the door.” Steve goes to pull Bucky, Sam, and Nat from the frame. 

“Put a hand on me, Rogers, and I’ll throat punch you.” Nat didn’t even have to turn to address him directly, he knew she wasn’t lying. 

“I expect that from these two clowns, but not you.. you’re better than…”

“Oh my god, Clint!” A faint woman’s voice travels through the thick wooden door. 

The four of them, eyes wide, jaws dropped, freeze in place. 

As if one body, four ears forcefully press themselves onto the door. 

“Ow, Bucky you’re on my foot!” Nat whispers as Sam bumps his elbow into her head. “Sam!”

“Sorry, Rogers is hogging all the room!”

“Quiet! I’m trying to hear who’s in there with him!” Steve waves his hand at the noisy three. 

Bucky shakes his head under Steve’s arm. “Righteous do gooder my ass.” 

Giggles come from inside the room, and they can just barely make out their conversation. 

“Come here little one!” Clint speaks to the unknown.

“Not so fast big guy…” The girl chuckles out. 

Nat eyes focus in as she hears a faint high pitched moan. “Let’s take this off… there, does that feel better?”

“No way…” Steve covers his mouth. “Is he really going to get it on in the closet?”

“Hey bro, when you want it, you want it.” Sam whispers. 

“Open your legs a little, give him some room.” Sam grabs onto Nat’s arm, not ready to believe that shy little Clint is actually trying to lay some game on a girl.

“That’s my boy.” Nat smirks at the door. “Go get her...what?”

All three boys stare at her like she has three heads. 

“Nothing.”  
“I didn’t say anything.”  
“Nothing at all.” They all say over each other.

“What...because I’m a girl, I can’t enjoy a good sex scene?” She rolls her eyes, pressing back against the door. “Get over yourselves.”

Another high pitched whimper travels to their ears. 

“You think he named it?” Bucky questions.

Sam looks up, confusion on his face. “Named what?”

“His, you know?” Bucky looks up to the ceiling. “Don’t make me say it.”

“Say what?” Steve responds, innocently as ever.

“His…” Bucky tries to continue, but can’t.

“His penis?” Nat piped up.

“Awe come on, Buck!” Sam hits Steve in the shoulder trying to quiet him down.

“Quiet down, Rogers… and yes, who doesn’t?” Sam shrugs his shoulders, like it was such an obvious thing.

“I don’t!” Nat looks at him in complete shock. 

“Really? I figured you of all people would have one.” She raises her eyebrows, surprised that she had been wrong. She was never wrong. 

“Why would you… No, I…wait, you guys have a name for yours?” He looks back at Bucky and Sam.

“Of course.” Sam says  
“Yuuup.” Bucky answers.

“Really?” He furrows his brows, not really shocked, but prepared to ask follow up questions.

“You really don’t have one?” Nat presses.

“No, what would I name it for, or more importantly what name would I want to give it? It’s just not something I ever thought about, I guess.”

“Oh my god! It’s so…”

“Big?” Clint confidently states.

“I was gonna say cute.” She explains.

“Ouch! That is not something you wanna hear.” Sam tucks his lips in, biting down on them, holding back laughter. “Well, from the sounds of it, your boy Cupid isn’t packing an extended tip arrow.” He pushes back against the door.

Bucky gives off the most devious smile, and tries his best not to lose it. A minute later...

“The Patriot.” Sam whispers

“What?” Steve looks at Sam 

“Your name. I figured it would be something Patriotic, or some shit.” Sam focuses back in on the door.

“I thought that too. Like something stupid, like... Freedom, or... The Iron Flagpole, The General. Oh, or Uncle Sam!”

“Dude… not cool.” Sam glares back at Bucky, and Bucky just laughs.

“I went with the Bald Eagle.” Nat is met with nods of approval.

“Nice.” Bucky holds out his fist for her to bump.

“Did you touch this one yet?” The female voice is finally heard again.

“Yeah, it’s so soft. This one too.” He says.

You can hear Clint start to giggle. 

“Hey, you’re getting me all wet!” 

“Steve, are you blushing?” Bucky pushes his friend almost knocking him off his feet.

“This is getting weird you guys.” He answers.

“No, this is getting awesome.” Sam rubs his hands together, and high fives Nat.

“Do you want to hold him?” Clint curiously asks his mystery women.

“Yes! Oh wow! He’s heavier than I thought he would be. I just want to snuggle him, and rub him on my face!” Bucky and Sam twist their faces back. 

“Who is in there with him?” Steve pulls a face and throws his arm out, trying to determine who it could be.

They go in to listen one more time, but stop as Bucky breaks down in a complete fit of laughter. 

In between breaths and tears, he manages to squeak out..”The bald eagle…” then doubles over, grabbing his stomach, as Sam starts to laugh with him.

“You never thought of that?” Nat sneers back at them, trying to keep her composure.

“I hate you guys.” Steve leans back crossing his arms, the slight pink on his face traveling to the tips of his ears.

“Did you hear that?” Squinting your eyes, you lean towards the door, when you hear the distinct sound of laughter.

“Yeah, I hear it too. Do you think someone knows we’re in here?” Clint grabs a box and starts to fill it.

“If Tony finds us he'll freak out.” You gather your belongings, throwing your shirt on top real quick. You grab the handle of the door, slowly inching your way out, trying your hardest to remain undetected.

Everyone gasps and straightens up immediately, as if all six of you had just been caught stealing.

“Y/N?” Natasha yells out, pointing her finger in your direction.

“Clint! You...and Y/N! No way!” Sam’s eyes burst open, making you start to panic, the sudden attention on you making the room feel like it was a furnace.

“What are you guys doing here...in the hallway...next to the door?” You question as Clint shimmies behind you, trying his best to hide the box, glancing both ways down the hallway wondering who else might pop up.

“What were YOU doing...in the hallway closet...behind the door?” Sam crosses his arms, a shit eating grin on his face.

“Nothing.” You and Clint both answer in unison.

“Nothing huh? Is that code for “sex.” Nat makes quotes with her fingers.

“What? No, we weren’t...You guys thought someone was having sex in here? Oh my god, you were listening to us ‘having sex’ in there!” You quote your fingers back to her.

“No!” She yells back, folding her arms.

“Yes. We totally were.” 

“Bucky!” Nat backhands his arm.

“What! She obviously caught us!” He backhands her back.

Steve watches Clint nervously fidgeting behind you still.

“What’s in the box, Clint?” Tilting his head to the side, Steve zeros in on the item in Clint’s hand.

“Nothing.” You state firmly. “And we were not having sex.”

The six of you all halt for a moment, watching each other trying to read one another’s thoughts. Clearly, you could all see that a big move was about to be made, but by who first was the real question.

The tiny edge of Steve’s lip lifts ever so slightly. “Grab them!”

“Noo!” Bucky grabs a hold of you waist, flipping you over his shoulder. Beating against his back, you scream for Clint to run, but it’s too late. He had already been placed in a chokehold by Nat, and Steve and Sam were already forcing the box from his hands.

“Be careful! You’re going to hurt them!” Biting Bucky’s butt, he yelps out and just about drops you to the ground.

Scrambling to the box, you open it and take stock, making sure there was no damage to it’s contents. 

“Are you guys okay?” You reach in and tuck something small into your lap.

Nat gasps, her face lighting up, as she points to the box.

“Look at all those puppies!” 

“Shhhh! Tony will hear you! If he finds out he would kill us! You know he hates pets in here!” 

Bucky and Sam drop down to the floor, each grabbing a small pup as they attempt to climb out the box, searching for attention.

“Where did they all come from?” Steve reaches in and takes out two, giggling like a school boy as they burrow up into his neck.

“I found them outside in the box. There was a note attached asking if we could take care of them, since we take care of everyone else. The vets closed for the night, so we were going to take care of them until tomorrow. We were just trying to keep them hidden from Tony.” Clint continued to explain why they were in the closet, but suddenly stopped when the sound on Tony’s voice could be heard approaching.

“Tony’s coming, shit, everyone hide a puppy!” The sight of the some of the toughest avengers on Earth, lifting their shirts to hide small little furballs, or stuffing them in their jackets and pants was a sight to see. It was all you could do to not start laughing, but for the sake of the little ones, you had to remain calm.

Tony points to all of you suspiciously, waving his finger around at all of you.  
“What’s… what’s going on here?”

“Nothing.” Three of you answer at the same time. Well that didn’t help.

“Are you sure?” He stares at Steve, knowing if any of you were to break, it would be him to spill the beans.

“We..” Steve starts but is cut off by Nat.

“We caught Y/N and Clint fooling around in the closet.” Your eyes bug out, before closing tightly, wishing the floor would devour you whole.

“I’m sorry, what?” Tony leans his head to the side, a grin overtaking his face.

“Y/N and Clint, in the closet, doing it.” Bucky repeats. He shivers a bit as a puppy runs his cold nose along his side.

Sam notices, and tries to cover it up. “Yup, we felt the same way when we caught them, shivers down my spine, dude.”

Tony watches the two of you, than finally makes eye contact with Clint. “Good for you Birdman, I didn’t know you had it in you.”

What the hell is happening here, you think to yourself. You wanted to be annoyed, but you were to busy trying to shift the small animal around in your shirt. You sigh in relief as Tony begins to back up, happy that his line of questioning had ceased, but then start to panic when he leans in closer to you.

“Is that...why are you covered in what looks to be...animal hair?” He looks up and down your shirt, wondering why you looked like you had rolled on the floor.

“Oh..I..um…” Shit, you were busted. There was nothing you could say to…

“Feathers.” Clint sputters out. 

“Feathers…?” Collectively you all watch as Clint tries to come up with a quick cover story.

“Yeah, feathers… cause you know, I’m a hawk and all.”

“I don’t…I… where are you going with this?” Yes, indeed, where is he going with this? You stare at him with confused wonder, and for a split second, he gives you the quickest of side glances. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to tell you that something bad was coming.

“She likes it when we roll play.” The look on your face was priceless. What did he just say?

“Role play?” Tony questioned.

“Yeah, role play… you know...I’m the hawk, and she’s the...um...field mouse.” Clint shakes his head, squinting his eyes in embarrassment . He knew that he would be feeling a world of pain later, and he knew it would be you delivering it. Lifting your hands up, you let out a small squeak before hiding behind them. 

“See. She gets really into it, the noises and all. Likes it when I chase her through the woods out back.” Clint nods his head your way.

“Please stop talking.” Begging him to stop, he apologizes as you continue to hide your face, mortified to look at Tony.

Tony waves his hand in front of you all, and shakes his head violently from side to side. “Nope, I don’t need to hear anymore.” Turning quickly he hurriedly walks down the hall towards the kitchen.

“Are you kidding me? Clint!” You begin to smack his arms aggressively while watching Sam and Bucky double over. 

“It was the first thing that came to my mind! I’m sorry! Hey, it worked, didn’t it?” 

“Let’s just get these guys out of here before he comes back again.” You all start to gather your pups from the various hiding places in your clothes. You all get in the elevator to head to your room, and breath a sigh of relief when the doors finally shut. 

“Hey, Y/N?” 

“Yeah, Nat?”

“Of all the names in the world that you could think of, what do you think Steve would pick to call his Penis?” 

“Natasha!” Steve throws his head back against the wall. 

“Oh, that’s easy. ‘Old Glory,’ of course.” Sam and Bucky begin to laugh hysterically, before you add in, “and he would call his junk ‘Stars and Stripes.’ Why?” You have never seen three grown men cry so hard from laughter before.

“I hate you guys.” 

 

.


End file.
